Conflict

>> Monday, January 18, 2010

Warning: One slightly graphic picture cut to make it slightly less graphic though still highly suggestive. Consider yourselves warned in a round-about kind of way.



Water thinks about it constantly. It's almost been a year since it happened, but that doesn't take away the anger or the hurt he felt when Demi left and took their two children with her to that creepy cult that lived far outside town. (Author's note: For the curious:Part 1, Part 2, Part 3)

He wasn't ever the sort of man who wanted to settle down and have children. From an early age, he'd pretty much said it wasn't for him. Never mind the fact that between high school and college, he'd had more serious relationship sex than he had meaningless sex.




But now he finds himself childless, technically, and in a new large and spacious apartment. Now when he can lead the life he always said he'd meant to, he finds himself decorating a room all in pink and carrying their toys left from their hasty departure to his new apartment. The hope is that they'll know that he was thinking about them always during their separation.

One room is already prepared for the day he gets his daughters back. But it's almost been a year already and he's no closer now than he was before at getting his daughters back. That's almost a year he's missed in their lives. Who's showing Shannen how to walk? Who's helping Melanie with her homework? The thought makes him queasy with anger.


So he just doesn't think about it. He keeps himself busy with work and the restaurant and meeting new people. It helps him not think.

Except those nights he goes to bed alone. His mind wears a trail looping over thoughts he'd prefer to not think about. His daughters sleeping at that creepy cult place probably being told that he didn't love them and wasn't looking for them. Demi falling for the words of Tristin Stratton who was even less worthy of trust than his sister Sofia.


If he looks like he's enjoying himself, it's just for show. To be polite, really. She called him. He doesn't really want to spread the pain. He doesn't want to talk about it anymore because all the talking he's done has done absolutely nothing to help him. And he doesn't really know what to do anymore.


It doesn't help, it doesn't make things better, but it is something. It stops the thinking letting his hand run along the crevice in her hip, fingering the delicate and rough lace of her underwear before it slides down her thigh. Feeling the strands of her hair brushing against his chest as she climbs on top of him, taking the lead and leading him away from those thoughts that fill his head when he is alone and goes to sleep.



She knows; he's sure she knows though he can't really find the words to say it again. Neither of them have discussed it. They've only carried on as if everything that had come before, their entire past hadn't happened. He's sure that he's being used as much as she's using him. Sometimes it feels ridiculous to find comfort in the silly repetitive ritual between two human adults. Sometimes he almost wants to laugh out loud about it.

But he doesn't. Not in any way that would be unusual. Though she has remarked on his smiling more at times. But she doesn't know, and he doesn't want to tell her. It's the smile of a man who doesn't really have much more to lose, who doesn't want to gain more just to lose it again. She doesn't really know what it's like to believe you're truly in love enough to give up everything only to have the one you were willing to give your heart to give it back and walk out with the two most important girls in his life.

If only there were a nice and neat way to end his story. You know, one of those beautifully poetic insights about life and love and maybe even the transient beauty of it all. But he's a realist, a pragmatist. It's almost been an entire damn year. What else can you really say?


********************************

So the last time I left these two Sam was saying some brave things. The words he can't say? I hope it's clear. He's not ready for a serious relationship. He's still hurting. And I totally get that from game play, lol.



Poor guy. Even though his chemistry with Sam is higher, I do believe that in his pixel soul he really loved Demi and he's really hurt by her leaving.

And, for anyone who might have forgotten, he really has tried everything. He's talked to the Mayor, but of course there isn't a police force to speak of, not that they can do anything with people living on the margins of town. And Water made a personal appearance over at the cult where he was promptly run off.

As for Sam, well, she was the one to call him once and invite him on an outing. Probably I will mention that later on. In the case of this entry, the inspiration came when I left the game running while checking up something or reading someone's post. When I went back, these two were hanging out at his house-- though they didn't actually make it past the lobby. Those darn comfy looking lobby sofas.

7 comments:

Carnaxa January 20, 2010 at 4:06 AM  

Awww, I feel for him. I really felt his pain through this post and the mechanical motion of what he was doing with Sam. It makes me wonder if it isn't doing more harm than good though.

Francesca Dean January 20, 2010 at 4:17 AM  

Water has really been through a lot and his "pixel soul" really comes through in this. He reminds me of the main character in The Notebook when he was trying to forget his love in the arms of another woman.

The Lunar Fox January 20, 2010 at 10:55 AM  

Carnaxa, he probably is. I've never had a sim that I let go crazy. He's been romance, but he was generally good except for an affair with Sam. Maybe Sam's a bad influence, lol.

Francesca, I've never watched that. It seems like a good bad idea to forget the one you're really thinking about.

Carla January 20, 2010 at 4:04 PM  

Poor Water. I definitely felt for him here. To have lost your entire family and to not know when or if you'll see them again...I can't imagine.

I know Sam wanted to make this a serious thing and Water wasn't ready and, it sounds like, still isn't ready. Did Sam just cave in, or is she hoping if they're together enough, Water will change his mind?

Laura January 20, 2010 at 7:13 PM  

Oh, Water :( This was just heartbreaking, but beautifully told. Very emotional piece! I really felt everything right along with him.

And it was said that Sam was likely using him as well, so I figured she kind of gave in about her sort-of ultimatum last time? I also wonder if it isn't just wishful thinking on her part, on the chance maybe they'll just fall into a relationship out of routine. Tricky, tricky for both of them.

I really hope his girls are okay though. How very sad :(

bbop January 20, 2010 at 8:11 PM  

Water really tugged at my heart strings! You made into words what he was feeling beautifully.

There's nothing sadder than wanting to love someone, but they are not there.

:(

The Lunar Fox January 20, 2010 at 9:05 PM  

Carla, I definitely think Sam needs more examination. Oh the stuff that's been going on with her! This is where the other Samantha will be very important I think because Amberle really can't understand Sam.

Wow, thank you Laura. To be honest, I just wrote this in the window (not my strong suit) and felt a little weird about it for some reason.

With Sam, it might be all of the above. In my head, I see her as a bit of a planner/conniver, but probably also a hopeless romantic.


Thanks, bbop. You're right, there isn't anything sadder than that.

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I'm a proudly nerdy girl who knows too much about X-Men and has stories running through her head when walking. This is really my first real attempt to share just a few of the stories that not only play in my head when walking, but play out when I'm playing my sims. I hope you enjoy. ^___^

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